1.10.3.5
\Schools\NormalSchool\SchoolSubjects\English.xml

<Description>English at senior high encompasses not only the basics, but also explores poetry and public speaking. As a result,
atudents become more persuasive in their everyday conversations.

1.10.3.5
\Schools\NormalSchool\Events\Location\Park\HypnosisPractice.ve.xml

"{Color}" is used instead of "{PrincipalColor}". For example:
<Str>Gently raising her up off your lap[color={Color}][i] "You'll be more comfortable sitting on my lap..."[/i][/color]

Unresisting, she follows your guiding hands[color=LightPink] "Yaawwn...  I...  Ok..."[/color]  Rising up, then sitting back down on your lap...

Gently bringing your hands around her[color={Color}][i] "Such a warm day...  You'll be more comfortable with your shirt undone...  Let me help you..."[/i][/color]

Wriggling a little[color=LightPink] "Ohhh...?  It is warm...  Ok..."[/color]
[pagebreak]
Opening her shirt, you wrap your hands around her pert young breasts[color={Color}][i] "Such a lovely day..."

"...  You feel aroused, and want someone to play with you...  Here...  I will help..."[/i][/color]

Wriggling again[color=LightPink] "Ohhh...?  Yesss...  Please...  I mean thank you..."[/color]

Gently kneading each breasts, and pinching her nipples to a nice firmness[color=LightPink] "Hmmm...  Ohhhh...  Yesss..."[/color]
[pagebreak]
Figuring you could have your way with her, but deciding that's enough for now[color={Color}][i] "I'll be going now...  I'll let you get back to your play..."[/i][/color]

As you walk away, the bewildered girl starts pulling her top back into place...</Str>

Expanding on the above, "Gently kneading each breasts" is also a typo.
Either of the following would be acceptable:

Gently kneading each breast
Gently kneading her breasts

Then there's Figuring you could have your way with her, but deciding that's enough for now
As I think there's a missing . after "now", a line break or even a colon.
Something more like this:

You figure you could have your way with her but decide that that's enough for now.
I'll be going now... I'll let you get back to your play..."

It might be correct overall but it just looks clumsy to me.

Calendar Entries:

• "First PTA meeting: Your meeting room. 4:00 am pm. (LS)
• "Inspect Chem Lab after 6:00 am am - ground floor, East hall, chemistry class"

"Unfortunately, a neighbour had seen you sneaking around before, and now sees sneaking out!"
now sees you sneaking out

In Principle's Office>Paperwork>Work on paperwork

QuoteYou sit down and prepare to do some paperwork in for the next hour or so.

What do decide to focus on?

omit "in" from first sentence
add "you" between "do" and "decide" to make it "What do you decide to focus on?"

>Update the teacher's manual

QuoteIt's a daunting task, but knowing it will help your teachers improve the quality of their lessons, keeps you motivated through the process.

omit comma (,) between "lessons" and "keeps"

>Work on the accounts

QuoteYou work through all the accounts, attempting to find any manor savings you can.

It's a daunting task, but in the end you manage to find some savings that will have a direct on the bottom line.

change "manor" to "minor"
add "effect" after "direct" to make it "direct effect on the bottom line."

Quote from: dalzomo on Mar 16, 2023, 03:51 AM>Work on the accounts

QuoteYou work through all the accounts, attempting to find any manor savings you can.
bottom line.

change "manor" to "minor"

Also omit "you can". The sentence is complete without it.

Quote from: oratorio on Mar 16, 2023, 01:54 PM

Quote from: dalzomo on Mar 16, 2023, 03:51 AM>Work on the accounts

QuoteYou work through all the accounts, attempting to find any manor savings you can.
bottom line.

change "manor" to "minor"

Also omit "you can". The sentence is complete without it.

An even terser version: "You work through the accounts to find any savings." The additional words (including "you can") add nuance and emphasis even if they don't change the primary meaning.

peeping event in clothing shop
"you also now it won't eliminate it!"
now > know

Random event in class.
./NormalSchool/Events/Location/School/Classroom Shared/BentOver.ve.xml

"I keep seeing people staring it me when I bend over..."

Maybe "staring at me"


./Schools/NormalSchool/Events/Location/School/Gym/RopeWalk.ve.xml
"Especially if they're first up like {First} here, and the rope is still dry.  But...  I find a little encouragement sorts that out!"[/color]</Str>

First is teacher. Second is student. Teacher is talking about student.

Location/Park/Pickpocket
Ask {him} to shows you some tricks

I'm not sure if this is deliberate. But anyway, there are two ways of expressing this without the (in my opinion) errant s in shows.

Ask {him} to show you some tricks.
Or
Ask that {he} show you some tricks.

1.10.5.3
Oder regular shipping for Carl.


./NormalSchool/Events/FunctionLibrary/Population/ChatHobbiesByArchetype.ve.xml
          <Name>I belive in the supernatural and destiny. You know... spirits, auras, astrology, fortunetelling. I just have a connection to these things.</Name>

./NormalSchool/Events/Location/School/Cafeteria/FoodDruggingAdministration.ve.xml

As {he} passes by {P2_Name}, {he} pauses for a moment, and then reaches out to grab {P2_his} {P2_Gender:ass|tits}, smiling wickedly.</Str>

Same for next screen in event. "Lewis gasps loudly as he gropes him."

Lewis Werner - he
Letitia Nickonsen - her

First NPC is female. I would suspect that Letitia dragged Lewis out of cafeteria and not Lewis dragged himself out.

Spoiler

[close]

same for other variations in same event. Events assume that P1 is male.

Text was fine (aside from another minor typo of drop vs drops).  Context was just setting the same NPC to p1 and p2.

first office meeting with Sierra
[color} you say.